White People Hate Jamie Lynn Spears

Funny Gossip — Fri, 30 May 2008 13:53:57 +0000

When Brit Brit went all crazy and started broadcasting her goodies all over town, white people rushed to the internet only to find up-close, high res pics of her stretch marks emerging from a parked car. Whitey then turned his attention to Jamie Lynn, thinking that maybe she would learn from big sis’s ridiculous life that you shouldn’t get knocked up by hillbillies. White people could forgive Britney (we didn’t, but we could). She was crazy and drunk on the life of celebrity, and she left us a younger sister who would be 18 in no time. But when Jamie Lynn came clean about her pregnancy, white people simultaneously cursed the whole Spears clan. Jamie Lynn is now the size of one of Britney’s houses, she hates her mom (as we all do), she’s staying with the fertile hillbilly and flaunting in the pages of People and U.S. Weekly, all the while making white people hate her more and more. For the love of God, white kids even stopped watching Nickelodeon when she’s on. If that’s not a sign of hatred, I don’t know what is. So now, as her pregnancy nears its end, and as her 18th birthday rapidly approaches, white people can’t help but wish Jamie Lynn would quietly move in with K-fed so her child can have some sense of stability and the rest of us can get on to hating other things that are worth our time.

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Things People Hate » Jamie Lynn Spears

White People Hate Jamie Lynn Spears