A Dick Move

Andy Dick might be one of the strangest cats around, so the reports from last week that Dick assaulted another man’s dick is highly predictable. Dick is about as gay as they come and he’s got a last name to prove it.

According to the report,  Phillip Daniels, a bouncer at Rum Runners in West Virgina, claims that Andy Dick tried to enter a bar without the customary wristband. When Daniels stopped the comedian and slapped a wrist band on his hand, Dick countered with a crotch grab.

Daniels report is connected to a couple of other reports from the night. Another unnamed victim also claims Dick was too touchy and a third man says Dick attempted to kiss him.

However, unlike the two previous reports, the third individual in the case will not press charges. The man named Jonathan Kraft, says he is a regular of the spot and when he saw Dick, he went right up to him and bought him a drink. However, Kraft says Dick tried to kiss him at some point and he quickly dismissed him by saying, “I’m not down with that.”

Kraft told TMZ that he has no intention of filing any complaint and he calls the charges against Dick “dumb” and “stupid,” saying, “he’s nationally known as a weird guy.”

Andy Dick is in hot water because he’s already on probation for another assault case in Los Angeles. The two new felony counts of sexual abuse that he is now facing could land him in prison for five years. Dick’s lawyers claim the allegations were a “dick” move and state that ”Andy is stunned by these allegations.”

Yet, Things People Hate feels like Dick would fit right in with the prison environment.