TWPH: Ding Dong Ditch

Blanco hombre is the easiest thing in the world to play a joke on. After many many years of never being messed with, white people have become so unsuspecting of a prank that they often walk right into them. It really is just like in the scary movie when the mass murdering rapist is hiding in the closet and the stupid white bastard has to walk over and open the closet door to get a better look when WHAM, they get a shive in the gut and bleed out all over their finely pleaded Gap clothing. And then raped repeatedly. People of color do not do this. If a black man hears something in the closet he is either getting his Saturday night special and swiss cheesing the closet or he is running through the wall like the Kool-Aid man. A classic prank is the ding dong ditch. I have seen whitey answer the door no less than 10 times in the span of an hour and each time he does the same stupid thing. He pokes his head out, he steps out onto the porch, he looks around, scratches his head, looks around some more and then goes back inside. By the 10th time, he “gets it” and is embarrassed so he pretends to prune his dandelions. Then he calls the neighborhood watch. If you ding dong ditch a person of color you had better be ready to git out da hood for at least a week because they will hunt you down and kill your whole family. Unlike white people, they are used to being fucked with and they don’t play around. An unlike people of color, when white people have visitors it’s not the repo man or cousin tyrone looking to “borrow” $100, it’s usually their bridge buddies looking for an entertaining evening of fine wine and classical music. So for the sake of not making whitey feel dumb, lets cool it with the ding dong ditching, it has really become the white man’s oppression of the 21st century.